these shoes got me laid... in a casket. the man that i met in a back alley way told me he liked my shoes and that he would trade them for his crocs. of course i said yes. later i found out that he had been raising scorpions in his shoes and all the eggs hatched at once. i almost died but before i passed out from excessive exposure to poison, something happened. i grew a scorpion tail thing and claws. i have now been accepted as the scorpion king. bow down peasants.
